You were a piece of shit!!!!!!
I mean, er, I learned a lot…I read a lot, I cried a hella lot, you got me into Gaga! You got me out of promiscuity and into real fun relationships! You taught me how to live off no money at all! Depravity! I learned how to drink less because of it! I smoked too much weed! I hung out with too many sensitive skaters! I realized all my friends were crazy! I realized half of those friends didn’t actually care about anyone but themselves! I realized that all my friends were moving away! I realized that boys 18-22 are going through a “phase” that I can’t understand! I was followed home by crackheads! There were pornos being filmed in my living room! I found out I was a target for a smear campaign led by lazy old bitches! I mixed too many prescriptions with other things! I made scenes at restaurants! I realized that publications kind of suck! Being an intern only pays if they serve you alcohol at their events! People should realize how pathetic they are! Avid internet people are weird!
Cont’d tomorrow.
Send me your NYE resolutions! I’ll write back and give you fun advice!
marlowetatiana@gmail.com